the beginning of the...I have no fucking clue1
Well, welcome our newest reader...John, everyone. Today, after several weeks of cajoling, I gave him the web address. I mean what the hell, he already has my heart...he might as well have my mind as well. Never fear though, I'm going to remain candid because this is my outlet, not anyone elses'.
Last night was phenomenaL,all things considered. I drove down to the city and as I pulled down his block he texted me asking if I was close by because he needed to go out to get cigarettes and booze. I told him that I'd pick him up and take him. He got in the car and my whole body was on pins and needles, I was so worked up over going to see him that I nearly dry heaved while in traffic (TMI I know). After a little bit of small talk he turned to me and said, "So are we going to have this conversation?" To which I replied quietly, "No, not tonight. I just want to have a good night, if this is going to be our last night." And we left it at that.
Perhaps to drown out the awkwardness or perhaps because we were going to BYOB place for dinner, John bought several bottles of wine. We went home and hung out on the couch with his roommate, drinking the one bottle wine before dinner. Our reservations wasn't until 9:30, which I was highly surprised about...he had planned a nice night, starting at this awesome little restaurant called Pumpkin. I knew I was going to be a drunken mess, partially because of circumstance and partially because the last time I had eaten had been at 10:30 that morning. Sure enough, as soon as we finished the bottle of wine and headed over to the restaurant, I was already more than comfortably numb.
The next morning we woke up hungover and a little disoriented. Me, due to circumtances and him...well I think it was a little of both. We agreed to go to breakfat but after kissing, neither of us were thinking about eggs. We started to have sex and I had this gay smile on my face like, "I need to remember everything about him and this for..." well you know. As did he, which is why he flipped me over I think,so he didn't have to see my every emotion on my ace.
And the rest of our day was incredibly weird. We spent the entire day in bed until 5:30pm. As sooon as we decided not to have breakfast, it was time for "the talk". We talked and we cried a lot. Oddly enough we also discussed our favorite tv shows growing up. It was bizarre. Every second I was next to him I was torn between leaving right away and staying. I obviously decided to stay.
More tomorrow when I can see the keys.
Last night was phenomenaL,all things considered. I drove down to the city and as I pulled down his block he texted me asking if I was close by because he needed to go out to get cigarettes and booze. I told him that I'd pick him up and take him. He got in the car and my whole body was on pins and needles, I was so worked up over going to see him that I nearly dry heaved while in traffic (TMI I know). After a little bit of small talk he turned to me and said, "So are we going to have this conversation?" To which I replied quietly, "No, not tonight. I just want to have a good night, if this is going to be our last night." And we left it at that.
Perhaps to drown out the awkwardness or perhaps because we were going to BYOB place for dinner, John bought several bottles of wine. We went home and hung out on the couch with his roommate, drinking the one bottle wine before dinner. Our reservations wasn't until 9:30, which I was highly surprised about...he had planned a nice night, starting at this awesome little restaurant called Pumpkin. I knew I was going to be a drunken mess, partially because of circumstance and partially because the last time I had eaten had been at 10:30 that morning. Sure enough, as soon as we finished the bottle of wine and headed over to the restaurant, I was already more than comfortably numb.
The next morning we woke up hungover and a little disoriented. Me, due to circumtances and him...well I think it was a little of both. We agreed to go to breakfat but after kissing, neither of us were thinking about eggs. We started to have sex and I had this gay smile on my face like, "I need to remember everything about him and this for..." well you know. As did he, which is why he flipped me over I think,so he didn't have to see my every emotion on my ace.
And the rest of our day was incredibly weird. We spent the entire day in bed until 5:30pm. As sooon as we decided not to have breakfast, it was time for "the talk". We talked and we cried a lot. Oddly enough we also discussed our favorite tv shows growing up. It was bizarre. Every second I was next to him I was torn between leaving right away and staying. I obviously decided to stay.
More tomorrow when I can see the keys.
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