This is blog of a woman who didn't know what she wanted and so chased after dreams and men in search of the answers...drunken hilarity ensued. Then one day she met a man who was everything she wanted, but he wasn't so sure. Then she did the unthinkable; after they broke up she gave him this blog address and she let him into her mind as well as her heart. Unbelievably, even after sorting through the sordid archives of failed relationships, one night stands and her lusty (and embarassing) pursuit to secure the heart of a certain young line cook, John somehow managed to fall in love with her too. Melina and John were married a little over six months after they started dating, running away to Las Vegas to seal the deal. You can imagine what the over/under bet was to see if they'd even make it a year!! Over a year later and they are still going strong...this blog has become their story. Need to tell me something? Email me at Melinalovesjohnny at gmail dot com
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Friday, July 01, 2005
Fifteen Hours of drinking...or I need a job
Ok for once I allowed my friends to get drunk. I offered to be the designated driver for the first half of the evening and then once we made our way back to thitwbar we parked my car and we agreed to walk home. Well it wasn't a minute too soon. Chelle and Cr were rocked off their socks. Drunk as skunks...I don't think I've ever seen the two of them come apart at the seams like this before. It was hilarious.

My drunkard friends were wonderful in their pursuit to catch me up. I believe I did about six shots in two hours and drank about seven beers. I still did not catch up...although, I definitely began to sway. Because we are all or nothing girls we decided to invite the bar back to my house to continue Drunkfest 2005. And guess who was the guest of honor? That's right. My boy Derek. He claimed that he "got no sleep" the night before and that he was going to go home to bed...but somehow we convinced him to come and get drunk with us. It may have been Cr's push up bra/cravy may have been my very visible nipples (it was cold in the bar), it may have been crazy Chelle harassing the shit out of him repeatedly. Whatever it was, it worked. And I for one am damn happy about that--because when you get Derek into your home it's like having a little piece of sunshine. He's just so darn cute. In a "I want to bang you like a screen door" kind of cute.

Ry pussied out and refused to come home with us. Running out the door as if he were on fire. Apparently, work was more important than drinking with the entire group of Drunkie McDrunkersons. We played some cards, drank a lot, played more cards, drank more...talked a lot. I lusted after Derek, a surprise of course... Most people left around 5-6 am. Derek then informed Chelle and I that we would not be sleeping because he had to work at 10 am. Where's the logic in this? I'm not sure since we all kept trying to sneak sleep.

To entertain us, I came up with the game Catchphrase. It turned out to be perverted fun. When Derek said a clue I replied, "A big dick"...this caused him to fall off his futon. From here, the game became completely sexual and ridiculous. After playing for an hour, we moved over to the futon and proceded to make fun of Chelle. Chelle most likely will be damaged due to the things that Derek and I were saying about her and her co-worker and their sex lives. Chelle kept whining, "Guys I'm a good girl!!" Derek and I basically said disgusting things about strap ons, the co-worker peeing on Chelle ala R Kelly and used those two topics to bust on her for about an hour. I can truly say that Chelle is scarred for life and this is what we hoped to accomplish.

An hour late, Derek finally left my home although I did not want him to. I had the single best time ever with him and I even told him that I wanted to be his best friend, I wanted to visit him in Colorado and that I didn't want him to go away. I may have said this more than 20 times but I'm not admitting to anything. Chelle and I were exhausted, we crept upstairs and crashed in my bed for a couple of hours before getting up to lay on the couch, eat Chinese food and nurse hangovers worthy of 15 hours of drinking...of course, I was only drinking for 11 hours.
posted by Melina at 3:03 PM