This is blog of a woman who didn't know what she wanted and so chased after dreams and men in search of the answers...drunken hilarity ensued. Then one day she met a man who was everything she wanted, but he wasn't so sure. Then she did the unthinkable; after they broke up she gave him this blog address and she let him into her mind as well as her heart. Unbelievably, even after sorting through the sordid archives of failed relationships, one night stands and her lusty (and embarassing) pursuit to secure the heart of a certain young line cook, John somehow managed to fall in love with her too. Melina and John were married a little over six months after they started dating, running away to Las Vegas to seal the deal. You can imagine what the over/under bet was to see if they'd even make it a year!! Over a year later and they are still going strong...this blog has become their story. Need to tell me something? Email me at Melinalovesjohnny at gmail dot com
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Wednesday, February 09, 2005
Melina Does Graduate School
When I started graduate school (boring adult school) I was amazed to see an acquaintance of mine from college (the mighty party school) in my class. What joy! I always thought he was good looking and even better than that, I always thought he was highly interesting, amusing, sexy, fun and wonderful. Sadly, in college he had a wonderful girlfriend who had his exact same qualities. I always kept him in my periferal vision just in case they broke up in college. But they didn't. But here he was, in my class--sitting in front of me.
Immediately we began to reconnect, and talk about all of our friends that we had in common and what was going on in so-in-so's on and so forth. Then he asked the question I had been waiting for (although I would've asked before the class was over--did I mention that I missed that entire first class because we kept whispering to each other)
"Wanna grab a drink or two after class? I heard Jake's is only fifty cents a mug!"
"I'm down for that, sure."
So we head out to the bar. And we have a blast. We were actually two people that shouldn't have been at the bar. Neither of us wanted to be "grown ups" and we both talked about "the best time ever" as some event in college. We both wanted to be in college again...not grad school...we wanted go out every night and get shitfaced college. So that's what we did. We spent $40.00 at Jake's Bar and we had mugs all night. Granted we bought a round for this one group of rowdy co-eds...and we bought a pair of Jake's Bar T's (a must have for the folks in our area) at $3.00 a piece and we bought two six packs (this was to execute our master plan, I'll explain later).

After having one of the weirdest, yet most interesting conversations in all my life, V and I both realized that we both live about 40 mins away from the campus and there was no way that either of us would be driving any where that night. Plus the fact that I was still living with my mommy and he...apparently...was living with his girlfriend from college. In my drunken haze I was saddened because he was a loyal boyfriend (how sick is that?) but I was made a bit happier when he confided in me that he felt like they were starting to fall apart. Well since neither of us could drive, and it seemed like neither of us wanted to part company, V devised a plan.

We grabbed our two six packs and started walking around the college town. As V stated, there had to be a party going on somewhere (it was a Tuesday) and if there was, then we could crash it. After we made friends with everyone (as we are both gregarious souls) we could then offer our second six pack as payment to be allowed to crash on their couch.

The plan worked like a charm. We went to a party. We played some beer pong, watched part of Fight Club and then finally we were allowed to go to sleep (I was starting to feel old), except that we didn't go to sleep. We made out on the couch, did some crazy petting routine and then V stopped and said, "I can't. I still live with L." We held each other all night and the next morning walked to our cars together. I had a pounding headache, a frantic message from my mommy on my cell phone because I never came home, and I had left a paper that I typed at home. We said our goodbyes and I ventured home.

The funny thing is, I remember that drive home vividly. So many thoughts and feelings swept through me, kind of like watching a storm roll through in fast forward. I felt awful (not just physically) but because I had never been the "other" woman before and I didn't want to be. I may not be the most moral of girls but at times I have my own code of ethics. I was also elated. Here was a guy that I knew in college, liked, definitely fantasized about and...I had spent a fantastic evening with. I don't even mean the rolling on the couch part. We talked and debated everything. After quickly picking up my errant paper, consoling my mother ("No mom I wasn't killed by a serial killer, and yes I will try to find a place to live soon...because yes, I know you hate to be treated like a bad college roommate, etc.") I stopped in at the coolest independently owned bookstore.

After our talk the night before we were talking about mythology and comparisons between different creation myths (and other very nerdy stuff...I swear though, we were so spiffy looking that no one could've possibly known that we were discussing what we were). After browsing, I bought a book of Native American myths and a notecard. I sat on the sunny campus benches and composed. And composed. And then I threw the note out. I was just going to leave the book at his car (person of habit, always parked in the same place) and then I realized I wanted to tell him and talk to him in person. In a moment of kismet, fate--what have you...he walked right up to me (who knows, maybe we were "stalking" each other and kismet had nothing to do with it).
"What's this?"
"It's a book of Native American myths. Last night you said that you didn't know very many of them when I was telling you about them, and how you were part Sioux...well this book is specific to three tribes and one of them is Sioux. I looked at it and I thought it was pretty cool."
"You didn't have to get me this," he said thumbing through the book, stopping to read random captions, "Why did you?" he looked up and our eyes meet and our cheeks flamed.
"Because...because I feel bad. And because I'm your friend. Last night we just practiced what friends don't do. I want to hang out with you, but I don't want to hang out with you at the expense of L, You'll end up disliking me after it's all said and done, and what do I really get out of the deal?" (I know that this is a direct quote because I just referred to my journal from that time period).
He smiled, "I want to be your friend too. I feel like we've always kind of had a little bit of I don't know? But I know exactly what you mean about stopping what started last night and being friends. I have something for you too," he slowly reached into his messenger bag and pulled out my black bra from the night before. Sheepishly he said,
"Friends can't keep friend's bras huh?"
"I guess not."
We did the hand-off with only a few minor glances from the undergrads traversing the courtyard, and then we trotted to class together. Talking about everything, talking about nothing.

We ended up hanging out all the time as strictly friends (as hard as it was). Seven months later, we were together.

Eight months after that, he broke my heart and I was never the same again. But to this day, he's still the coolest guy I've ever had the pleasure of hanging out with. Unusual thoughts and a different slant on life. It was nice.
posted by Melina at 7:33 PM