This is blog of a woman who didn't know what she wanted and so chased after dreams and men in search of the answers...drunken hilarity ensued. Then one day she met a man who was everything she wanted, but he wasn't so sure. Then she did the unthinkable; after they broke up she gave him this blog address and she let him into her mind as well as her heart. Unbelievably, even after sorting through the sordid archives of failed relationships, one night stands and her lusty (and embarassing) pursuit to secure the heart of a certain young line cook, John somehow managed to fall in love with her too. Melina and John were married a little over six months after they started dating, running away to Las Vegas to seal the deal. You can imagine what the over/under bet was to see if they'd even make it a year!! Over a year later and they are still going strong...this blog has become their story. Need to tell me something? Email me at Melinalovesjohnny at gmail dot com
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Wednesday, March 14, 2007
Husbands say the darndest things...
After my party I decided that I needed to sleep...just...a...little. And so, I decided to sleep until about 3 pm. I valiantly stayed awake with my tedious hangover for several hours until I felt I could take it no more. That time came around 8:45 pm. Yep, I stayed awake for only a handful of hours. But then a curious thing happened.

I awoke at 1am with a desire for some dirty, sweaty, hungover sex. I rolled over to see what John was doing. I was surprised to find him sleeping. How could he do that to me?!? Sleep at 1am?!? Nay, I say! So I did my best to wake him up. First I started rubbing on him, then I started whispering things in his ear, I even grabbed his shoulders and gave him a quick shaking. When he became semi-conscious, I did my best to convey my needs to him. I think it went a little like this:

Me: John! Wake up and give me some loving!! I want sex!

John: Huuuh? Wha? (Snoooooooorrrrrrrrreeeeeee)

Being the resourceful girl that I am, I reached over and grabbed my old pal Mr. Pink, the very happy (and friendly) vibrator who hasn't seen much solo action since I've been married. In a few minutes we were reacquainted and I was satified and ready to go back to sleep. I rolled over toward John and said to him, "Spoon me!" in a very whiny voice and he replied sleepily with a very simple phrase that will forever make me grin:

"Why don't you get your vibrator to spoon you?"

What can I say?? The thing's pretty loud.

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posted by Melina at 8:29 PM