This is blog of a woman who didn't know what she wanted and so chased after dreams and men in search of the answers...drunken hilarity ensued. Then one day she met a man who was everything she wanted, but he wasn't so sure. Then she did the unthinkable; after they broke up she gave him this blog address and she let him into her mind as well as her heart. Unbelievably, even after sorting through the sordid archives of failed relationships, one night stands and her lusty (and embarassing) pursuit to secure the heart of a certain young line cook, John somehow managed to fall in love with her too. Melina and John were married a little over six months after they started dating, running away to Las Vegas to seal the deal. You can imagine what the over/under bet was to see if they'd even make it a year!! Over a year later and they are still going strong...this blog has become their story. Need to tell me something? Email me at Melinalovesjohnny at gmail dot com
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Thursday, March 01, 2007
Loose Lips Sink Ships

While giving blood yesterday my pal Ml must've been feeling a little woozy. She revealed secrets...secrets about me. Secrets that are most delicate in nature; about what I like to do in my free time--for example, maybe...just maybe...I get drunk and I put my dad's prosthetic hook on my hand. C'mon! Tell me! Tell me that you wouldn't do it if you had had a hook sitting on a shelf looking all lonely-like.

The person that Ml told looked shocked. Ml tried to explain, "Well, it's just like a hat. Let's say your dad died and he left you a hat, you'd wear it right?"

The girl looked directly at Ml and said, "But it's not a hat, it's a hook!" Which made me think of the scene in I Heart Huckabees where Jason Schwartzman's character tries to give the valet his bike and tells him to pretend it's a car. The valet says, "But it's not a car, it's my job!" That made me giggle, and then it made me think of this...

The girl came in today and confronted me, "Do you wear your dad's hook when you're drunk?"
My reply was, "Well yes, sometimes then. But I wear it whenever I feel like really, why do you ask?"
She gave me the look reserved for small children and animals that are behaving badly and she told me that I'm cracked in the head. I didn't deny it. C'mon, it's not like I wear the hook out of the house. Yet.

PS. That's the real hook above.
PPS. It is covered in camouflage duct tape.
PPS. I have no idea why.

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posted by Melina at 1:21 PM