After first updating my mom about the very slooooowwww seduction of Drk (think a combination of the movie The Last Seduction and A Very Long Engagement except without the seduction or engagement). My mom sighs and says very slowly, "Sometimes it seems like he might like you...and other times I'm sure he just wants to turn and run from you. Don't forget you are a force to be reckoned with. I'm not going to tell you what I'm thinking..." and then she trails off. What she's thinking people is that she wants to be a grandma before she gets old and wrinklely and at this point she will take a bastard grandchild. To cheer her up I tell her about my Monday night booty calls. She instantly perks up and says, "That's my baby! You must have some strong mojo!"
"Mojo, Mom? in my condescending voice. She can hear my sneer.
"Well I can't very well say you're a hot piece of ass! [Middle aged boyfriend's name] is standing right here and he'll think it's weird that we talk this way."
"What way?"
"Like the Gilmore Girls"
"Awwww. Are you coming over to watch it?"
"Do I ever miss it?"
"Later Lorelei."
"See ya soon Rory"
[Ok we're total nerds, but we love each other. In fact, I'm wearing a pink t-shirt that says I [heart] Mom! right now]