This is blog of a woman who didn't know what she wanted and so chased after dreams and men in search of the answers...drunken hilarity ensued. Then one day she met a man who was everything she wanted, but he wasn't so sure. Then she did the unthinkable; after they broke up she gave him this blog address and she let him into her mind as well as her heart. Unbelievably, even after sorting through the sordid archives of failed relationships, one night stands and her lusty (and embarassing) pursuit to secure the heart of a certain young line cook, John somehow managed to fall in love with her too. Melina and John were married a little over six months after they started dating, running away to Las Vegas to seal the deal. You can imagine what the over/under bet was to see if they'd even make it a year!! Over a year later and they are still going strong...this blog has become their story. Need to tell me something? Email me at Melinalovesjohnny at gmail dot com
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Wednesday, July 09, 2008
All I wanted was a pickle
I was just about to leave the grocery store when I had a sudden need for pickles...but not just any pickles, I needed a pickle from the barrel. You know what I'm talking about, barrel pickles are the best pickles out there! On a side note, when I was a very small child, I got a little overzealous about picking out my barrel pickle and I fell in. My dad had to pull me out! But that's neither here nor there because this was by far more embarassing than having my feet dangling out of a pickle barrel.

So, I mosey away from the register where I almost made a clean getaway and went to the very back of the grocery store in search of my pickle barrel. Just as I approached the pickles I felt a sneeze coming on and the first thought in my head was, "Oh God, I haven't peed in a while..." which might be a weird first thought for you, and it would've been a weird first thought for me four months ago but now that I'm pregnant when I last peed is first and foremost in my mind and here's why. I sneezed. Hard. And while I was sneezing I bent over and clenched as hard as I could but it didn't stop anything...I peed myself! I didn't just pee myself a little, I peed enough to make a spot on my newly acquired (and newly needed) maternity jeans!

I made a quick beeline for the closest register and got out of Dodge before someone suggested that I stop in aisle 8 and pick up some Depends. Tell me that I don't lead a glamorous life!

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posted by Melina at 10:03 AM