Whooo! Who's ready for the wet t-shirt contest?
ZZZZZZZZZZ....
Oh I'm sorry, I nodded off. This is pretty much the worst Spring Break ever...(and yes Kip from Napoleon Dynamite...Like anyone COULD ever know that! Me!). I remember the Spring Breaks of my yesteryears. I was drunk, hot boys were drunk, we were tan, we were nekkid...actually no...
My birthday fell over Spring Break every year in college. So my 21st birthday, I was going to be spending it in Panama City Beach, Fla (the poor college student vacation). My parents were lending me their boat of a car so that five of my closest sorority sisters (yep I was a sista) and I could head down to the best vacation of my life. But first? First I had to tell my parents that I had been arrested for underage drinking...gulp...

It kind of went like this. Parents show up with large boat that impersonated a car. I hug them, I go to lunch with them. They are about to leave in my car (we swapped) and I lean in the window, "Oh by the way..." My dad just hit the up button the power window and slammed the car into gear. I think I heard him cursing at me until he got back on the turnpike. I turned my cell phone off, and I was off for vacation (oh, the charges were later dropped due to insufficient evidence) and my birthday!

We drove down to Panama City in 15 hours. I drove the whole way and stopped only once for the girls to eat dinner. I was determined to get the party started. I was feeling a little achy, but I chalked it up to stress (midterms/telling parents about being arrested) and driving for fifteen hours straight. We got down there early. Too early to check into our hotel room, so we went to Walmart. As children of the North, we were excited to shop for kegs and booze in Walmart, of all places. All my friends were buzzing around buying all sorts of liquor and saying, "Happy Birthday M. This is for you!" as they put into the cart. I would smile weakly because I was feeling even a little more run down. Well fuck that. I was going to party hard, sick or not. You turn 21 once.

As we loaded our booty (mostly alcoholic beverages) into the car it began to rain torrentially. The temperature began to plummet. I think it evened out somewhere between 45-55 degrees F. and remained there for the rest of the week (as it poured). My parents (in PA) were experiencing highs of 65-70 F weather all week (which is by no means warm, but Hello!!!!).

Day two...that night at 12 I was going to turn 21! During that day, my body started to turn a lovely shade of red as a rash started spreading across my body starting on my belly. Yes, just as on the Oregon Trail, I had developed Scarlet Fever. Again. I had Scarlet Fever when I was in third grade...who gets that this day and age? Apparently me! And it's supposed to be like chicken pox, once you get it, you're never supposed to get it again. Well, I've had it three times and I don't doubt that I will get it again someday! I had to go to some creepy free clinic place where all the Spring Breakers were being treated for the Clap and Chlamydia...and in walks the human rash. Never in my life did I feel more repugnant. The room full of walking STDs parted like the Dead Sea and let me walk past them. And that folks, was the worst birthday/Spring Break ever. I wasn't allowed to drink all week because of the meds that I was on...and I didn't want to risk it because everyone was all freaked out (Doctor-wise, my friends were drunk pretty much all week) about me getting it twice. I couldn't tan because a) it poured all week and b)I was covered with an icky photosensitive rash. I couldn't fuck because a) I didn't have the energy and b) no one would come near me because they thought I had some tropical disease. I couldn't drink because a) the meds and b) because all my friends drank all my "birthday presents" when they heard I wasn't allowed to drink.

This Spring Break so far:
I have watched about 20 hours of TV I have taped over the last three years and haven't had time to watch. I should've never taped this crap because it all sucked.

I have been bitten by my dogs about 1,093 times because I've tried to intervene in their fights.

I have begged six people to go drinking with me. None of them obliged me.

I have done some of my job duties that I have to bring home with me...but not nearly enough.

I have washed my hair twice, attempting two different hairstyles.

I have applied makeup like I saw in one of the magazines and recreated the look perfectly.

I have posted about twelve posts in six hours.

I am going to update my scrapbook...if I can get my butt off my couch to find it first.

Whooo go Spring Break '05!