This is blog of a woman who didn't know what she wanted and so chased after dreams and men in search of the answers...drunken hilarity ensued. Then one day she met a man who was everything she wanted, but he wasn't so sure. Then she did the unthinkable; after they broke up she gave him this blog address and she let him into her mind as well as her heart. Unbelievably, even after sorting through the sordid archives of failed relationships, one night stands and her lusty (and embarassing) pursuit to secure the heart of a certain young line cook, John somehow managed to fall in love with her too. Melina and John were married a little over six months after they started dating, running away to Las Vegas to seal the deal. You can imagine what the over/under bet was to see if they'd even make it a year!! Over a year later and they are still going strong...this blog has become their story. Need to tell me something? Email me at Melinalovesjohnny at gmail dot com
Check out my other blogs:

igotyourtexts.blogspot.com

melina310.wordpress.org
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Friday, March 18, 2005
The Eve of Cr's Birthday...Aka...I Got Really Drunk And I Had An Excuse
First of all the night could've been called, "Shots, shots and more shots!" We just realized that we did ten shots in two hours. Um, hi alcohol poisoning--nice to meet you! However, Chelle thinks that we got our daily dosage vitamin C and calcium because of the lime and Baileys (I personally doubt there a lot of calcium in there...). The members of the "in-crowd" included: Chelle, Cr, Cr's boyfriend C, C's bro, and Ml for a little bit.

Drk was being sociable with everyone but little ol' me...probably because I was mean to him. I openly announced to the bar that he had gained the five pounds that I recently lost! Gee, I really wonder why he hasn't taken a liking to me? And I really wonder why I persist in using the second grade dating methods, you know-the whole " I love you so I think I'll tell everyone you smell" mentality. I even went as far as to throw 19 nickels at him. I'm not sure why, but it was funny at the time. Honestly, I really don't think he could find a classier catch! Who else would tell him that he's hot one minute, then tell him that he's getting a gut, then throw money at him? No one but me baby!

Chris, the bartender was working last night and it was the first time I had seen him since the whole "Matty/Condom" incident, and of course, Chris doesn't let me slide on anything. He smirks and says, "How was the rest of your birthday night?" I attempt to be sly and say, "Good, nothing happened" because of course, I'm trying to appear virginal at the bar (for Drk's sake--they really never know that I go home with people!! We probed them about it). I tried to blame Cr for the incident but she wouldn't go with it! Damn her. I definitely looked guilty as hell. Oh well. Now Drk knows I'm not a virgin...because you know he definitely thought so before (uh huh). Other than us girls being ragged on by the bartenders, and us harrassing them (throwing coinage at them and such) the night was fairly uneventful...oh except for that fellow and the penis picture...so we decided to party it up in my basement bar. This is a good thing, because the bar has seen very little action other than what Matty and I have given it.

We all pretty much just hung out downstairs. C's brother and I got the wise idea to play beer pong at three thirty am so we ventured out to my garage which houses a year round beer pong table. I could put my car in there, but where would the table go, I ask you? We didn't end up playing actually so we came back inside. Other random things that occured were: we invited two strange men home from the bar that no one wanted to hook up with...um why did we bring them again? The one boy kept making Chelle touch his chest and then kept telling her that she was, "Soooo sexy." Chelle was not impressed. Unfortunately I can't retell the events of the rest of the evening because everything became verrrry hazy...

I woke up this morning and the front of my hair is fro-ed ala Richard Simmons, I was hoping for a cool fro but it wasn't in the cards apparently. I have the hair of a gay white man who cries a lot. How did I get it? Not exactly sure. Chelle says that I was sleeping in the corner of the couch all balled up to the point where she actually thought it looked painfully contorted so she stretched my legs out for me.

Today is officially Cr's bday and what has she done so far? Oh, I've made her clean my house for the party--because that's what slobs do, make other people clean. It's a bonus when it's their birthday. Now the rest of the day is devoted to getting things ready for the party...and hopefully I can talk the girls into hitting thitwbar for a little bit so that I can catch a glimpse of my little man...or at the very least find the guy (who I've known forever but I can't ever remember his name) with the girthy penis!! Keep your fingers crossed for me!

Do you really think Drk is going to come to my party? I think I'll faint if I see him standing in my house...seriously. Is it wrong to hope?
posted by Melina at 2:33 PM