Last night I decided to stay in because of my nine hour hurrah at THITWbar. Actually, I lie. My body pretty much decided for me. I could've pushed it, but I figured I put my liver through enough for the weekend so just stayed put on my couch and flicked channels aimlessly wearing mismatched flannel pyjamas feeling bored, lonely and hungover. I could've posted all night but I didn't feel like it. I didn't feel like doing anything. The dogs had no pity on me, pouncing on me and licking me every time my eyes closed; reminding me that I shouldn't make plans to have children any time soon--because hangovers are a bitch when you have dependents.

Cr called and asked me to go to dinner with her and her new man of the hour, W. I declined having just gotten off the cool tile of the bathroom floor and extricating myself from the embrace of my lovely Kohler toilet. I also realized that I need to wash that floor...ew. I think I had a slight touch of alcohol poisoning, clever girl that I am. You'd think after six years of legal drinking and however many years of illegal drinking I'd know my limits, huh? Guess not. At least Matty was here on Friday, that was pretty much the only thing that made last night tolerable--good memories.
Oh and you know what? While on the floor holding the toilet tightly, I had an epiphany. I'm giving up on Drk, even though he just got the hottest new tattoo that covers his entire back and I'm a sucker for nice ink. Blame it on trying to find someone like your dad, he had twenty six tattoos. I saw it, it made me weak in the knees (I wish I was lying), had a vision of touching it while tangled in my sheets and then bam! Reality sets in, he's never going to get tangled in my sheets. Matty's a hundred times hotter/nicer than Drk and he gives me the time of day every time I see him, whereas Drk does not. Drk holds all the cards, and when he wants to be nice to me he is, and when he wants to ignore me, he does. Granted, Drk sees me at my worst--when I'm blind drunk, but after all the stupid things I've done to get him to notice me and like me, I realize it was a waste of time. Love letters on coasters, announcing my love at the bar, and all the other things were all for naught and I should've known that because I don't think I ever had to do anything like that before to attract a man. I can't say it wasn't fun, because it was...it's just disappointing that it didn't have the desired effect. And although I wouldn't ever want to be in a relationship with Matty (and I'm sure it's vice versa), it's nice to know that someone does find me attractive and I don't have to hire a skywriter for him to notice me.

I'm sure I'll change my mind about Drk, and I may go back to my old ways...but it might be a good idea to take a break from THITWbar, get my self respect back and then head back in. Ha. The bar's closed today, do you think Monday is too soon? Kidding, of course.